So in order for the divorce to finalized we had to go to a parenting class. Not really what I wanted to do, but I did.
So I went to this parenting class last week. It was in Soda Springs. Did I drive? Yes. I did not want to be in the car for an hour with Gerald, 3 hours in a class with him, then and hour home with him. The class was not something I wanted to go to anyway, let alone go with him in the same car. Which ended up being a good thing because we were the only two in the class.
The class was very quiet to say the least. The only one talking was the instructor. So it went pretty fast. At the end she asked if there was any questions. My only question was how do plan to do stuff when the other parent has the kids? Because I have at least one 24/7. She didn't understand this, so I preceded to tell her that I have one child that refuses to stay at his house. She asked why, Gerald told her that because he doesn't like the house. She said that shouldn't matter, that he needed to learn who was the parent, who was in charge. Gerald preceded to tell her that if he made him stay that he would make life miserable for the rest of the kids. There was always an excuse of why he couldn't make the child stay at his house.
She very bluntly told him that he basically needed to step up. That this child is ruling the house and what goes on. That we needed to use some back bone on this child or he was going to have problems when he gets older. I said that I do when he is at my house. But I can't very well tell him that he can't come home, when he gets dropped off at my house. She preceded to tell Gerald that he needs to quite making me the bad person all the time. That he needs to step up and be a parent.
All I could think of was, I am glad that someone else told him this, because he doesn't listen to me when I tell him. I am always the bad parent, because I tell my kids no.
Do you think that he has stepped up any. Nope. The child still stays with when his dad is home.
I wonder what it will take to get him to realize that he needs to be a parent to his kids, and not there best friend.
I struggle with this all the time. I so want my kids to be able to come to me for anything and tell me anything. But I also realize that I need to set boundaries with them. That they need to learn to respect authority. And that at times I do know better.
But it makes it hard because I again end up being the bad parent. The one that is always telling them no. That is always setting boundaries for my kids. Then they get with their dad, and he lets them do whatever.
So what do I do? I just do the best that I can. I do what I need to do to raise my kids when I have them.
That is my soap box today!
So I went to this parenting class last week. It was in Soda Springs. Did I drive? Yes. I did not want to be in the car for an hour with Gerald, 3 hours in a class with him, then and hour home with him. The class was not something I wanted to go to anyway, let alone go with him in the same car. Which ended up being a good thing because we were the only two in the class.
The class was very quiet to say the least. The only one talking was the instructor. So it went pretty fast. At the end she asked if there was any questions. My only question was how do plan to do stuff when the other parent has the kids? Because I have at least one 24/7. She didn't understand this, so I preceded to tell her that I have one child that refuses to stay at his house. She asked why, Gerald told her that because he doesn't like the house. She said that shouldn't matter, that he needed to learn who was the parent, who was in charge. Gerald preceded to tell her that if he made him stay that he would make life miserable for the rest of the kids. There was always an excuse of why he couldn't make the child stay at his house.
She very bluntly told him that he basically needed to step up. That this child is ruling the house and what goes on. That we needed to use some back bone on this child or he was going to have problems when he gets older. I said that I do when he is at my house. But I can't very well tell him that he can't come home, when he gets dropped off at my house. She preceded to tell Gerald that he needs to quite making me the bad person all the time. That he needs to step up and be a parent.
All I could think of was, I am glad that someone else told him this, because he doesn't listen to me when I tell him. I am always the bad parent, because I tell my kids no.
Do you think that he has stepped up any. Nope. The child still stays with when his dad is home.
I wonder what it will take to get him to realize that he needs to be a parent to his kids, and not there best friend.
I struggle with this all the time. I so want my kids to be able to come to me for anything and tell me anything. But I also realize that I need to set boundaries with them. That they need to learn to respect authority. And that at times I do know better.
But it makes it hard because I again end up being the bad parent. The one that is always telling them no. That is always setting boundaries for my kids. Then they get with their dad, and he lets them do whatever.
So what do I do? I just do the best that I can. I do what I need to do to raise my kids when I have them.
That is my soap box today!
