Relationships and Intimacy

I have been thinking a lot about relationships and intimacy....Do they go hand in hand? Can you have a relationship with anyone without having the intimacy? Can you go without a relationship and just have intimacy?

First of all the definition of Intimacy is about being emotionally close to a partner, about being able to let your guard down, about letting her or him know how you really feel. Intimacy is about being able to accept and share your partners feelings, about being there when he/she wants to let their defenses down.

The definition of a Relationship...an emotional or connection to another person.

So just by the definitions alone they do go hand in hand. No you can't have any type of a relationship without intimacy. If you have intimacy you have a relationship.

I know I have a hard time with all parts of intimacy. It is hard to find that someone that you can let your guard down and be close to. Because if you let that person in, they are almost always going to hurt you. So you put that wall up. So your relationship ends up being just a sexual intimacy...You are just out for that physical touch. Don't let them in for anything else. Is that a good relationship? Probably okay at first, but at some point you are going to have to let your wall down and become more than just sexually intimate. The sex part does not last forever. You need to be able to connect with someone on the emotional side to. 

You have to be able to have both the physical and the emotional intimacy for a relationship to withstand all things in life. If you don't, you will lose in the long run. You will be alone.

I know for a fact that in my marriage there was neither. There was not emotional or physical in our relationship for a very long time. That was our downfall. That is why our relationship did not stand the test of time. 

I hope as I am going back into the dating scene that I can remember that a relationship and intimacy go hand in hand. That if I find that one person that is my "soul mate", that I will have both the physical and emotional intimacy in our relationship. Because I know that you need to have both in order to have a strong foundation for your relationship.

Here are a couple of quotes that I found on relationships and intimacy.

So thru out my life now my goal is to be able to find that someone that I can connect deeply with that I feel like I can see into their soul. Wow! How would that feel? To have that type of a relationship with someone. To me, very scary. That means that I have left myself with my wall down and very vulnerable.

Well let see how it will go. To relationships and intimacy. Let's hope that I will be able to find that one person that will help me let the wall down and be vulnerable.